Internet Dating Secrets For Men - Use Patience To Build Your Power
What happens when you write a great dating profile online? You"ve communicated that you have direction in life, that you are excited about life, that you are in service to people around you, that you steer your own ship. You have subtly communicated that your senses are alive and that you are vulnerable and open within a masculine context of strength.
You"ve done your homework on how to write a great profile and now the women are writing to you!
So NOW what do you do???
If you are like most guys, you gush! You write back to them right away! You show your cards - you are amazed at how easy this is! How great you are! What a great date you can have together!
And she will not write you back.
Here"s how to fix that.
Don"t respond. That"s right. Wait it out. Instead, sit with her profile. Without judgment, without desire. Be a Zen Master for a few hours. Feel who she is. Sit with her words. One or a few of them will jump out as concentrated points of emotional passion:
Ask yourself these questions:
o What is she trying to project? o Who is the hopeful, pained person she behind what she says? o What"s semi-hidden about her? o Where do her deepest passions lie? o What really matters to her? o Who really matters most to her?
How can you stand out from every other guy by crafting a brief note back that shows that you get her?
If you can answer one or more of these questions, your response will stand out, because your response, unlike all the other guys" goofy notes, yours will make her feel special. And John Gray, The Mars/Venus guy is right on when he says, "Whenever a man does something to make a woman feel special, in her eyes, he becomes more attractive."
In study after study, women reveal that even if they are not physically attracted to a guy at first, his interest makes him more attractive!
Did you hear that? Did you get the HUGENESS of that? You don"t have to look like Brad Pitt or be as rich as Bill Gates. You just have to be interested in her!
What you have to be interested in is not only her surface facts, but ideas about herself, her fantasies of herself, her emotional life, her dreams, her self-worth.
Remember -- women will always ask to be heard. It"s their #1 complaint in relationships! They want to be understood. Guys want to use them. Guys want to change them. Guys want to talk over them. They blur into a mass of blah.
The alternative: Capture her imagination right away online by being her dream guy - the guy who has really, genuinely listened not only to her words but to her yearning desire behind the words!
I call this throughout my workbooks "singing to her idealized self." This technique has you studying a woman"s profile until you sense where she stakes her value in the world. If you hit it dead-on, she will be yours!
Now, notch up your attractiveness one step further by leading with another great technique: qualification.
Say, "You seem to really care about your sister," or "I sense that you give so much of yourself to your students..." and then add how warm that makes you feel, how much you admire her for that. By adding the qualification technique, you now get to seem intuitive and she will feel compelled to confirm your intuition and compliment you for your insight into her virtue.
So take that meditative moment - it could last an hour or a day. Be skilled. Be disciplined. Be Patient.
You'll be in her arms sooner than you think.
Author: Grant Adams
Grant Adams is the world"s leading Internet Dating Guru, and the creator of the Net2Bed-Net2Wed System Manual. Grant offers free Internet Dating Tips at his website
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